Is all about watching the bubbly kid growing and learning very positively,who is planting surprise kisses very often and loves you so much and expresses the same by cuddling you often and prefers to  snuggle very often.

Am must say am happy to watch her grow up as a lovely kid,she is weak,she doesn’t hit back others,she even wants to share things with kids who doesn’t want to share a thing with her.It was good see her crying to her appa and tell him that “Is it not good to share ? sharing is good right”.This was when she had a teeny chocolate and there were 6 kids in my home,and appa said not to take chocolate out and create mess,but she wanted to share it to all of them.

But as an adult it is possible for  me to teach her that she should not share things with kids who don’t share a thing with her,since i feel she will be exploited if she grows like this,but  i  also feel, i should not corrupt her,and as usual i have not made a decision and let it go by the flow.

The below on Facebook,

Repenting on the past mistakes,lets you remorse
Make things around you even worse
Learn from it and move obverse
For you can’t correct it with a reverse

Past few days i wondered as whether i have done a shabby job of parenting,i have grown a very weak and timid,sensitive,still dependent on amma kid.She loves home so much,for that she doesn’t cry in school but feels very unpleasant in school,not interacting much seeks approval for each item from her staff,she doesn’t even strikes back or informs her teacher if any kid strikes her(as told by her class teacher).She doesn’t talk to others much,but still she has made few friends.Upon leaving time she tells her route bus no and requests to be left there.

A big time observer who drifts into her own world most of the time.While am explaining the very interesting story of  ‘When earth lost its shape’, she glances through the car window and asks me why one tree is not straight and why the branches are bent ?a line was stolen from this tree alone ? On Ammamma telling very interesting stories about kitta,she wonders if he will come to our house or will respond if he call him.

Very imagining child who struggles to fit in a classroom environment,and clearly shows no interest in writing alphabets umpteen  times,instead shows big time interest in singing rhymes and colouring.

It’s dreadful for me to think i have grown a misfit in this society.

I don’t have answers at this moment,but i would want to let go by the flow.

I still remember my early school days,not LKG but UKG,i did not make big friends whole my life,let alone childhood.But i was definitely not weak like her.I don’t know  appa’s history though, for now i would go by the flow,few days had been really traumatic thinking to repair the damage already done,but no more thinking about it.

State of my mind right now,a holiday tomorrow with a planned program already,evening drive with windows open and breezing wind right on your face,amma in home who takes away all responsibility from you,truly a blissful state of mind,except that the fact the better half is not around.

Professional life had been very pressing in recent past and was suffocating,it was very hard to manage all the ends,in which you get a comment “We will stop having Idli,only after idli gets bored of being our Breakfast”.Prioritizing happens but still life expects too much from a working women,i do have a domestic help,DD does his part,still i was not able to manage.Most of the time i get irritated from what my maid  does, than a sense of relief.

So to have a break from the tiring routine and to spend quality time,i have started reading books to kids nearby on weekends,its heartening to see the kids enjoy books and ask for more.I did one on her birthday and felt the kids loved it,so doing it whenever time permits,i also get kids at random time ringing the bell, to find out if i will be able to read few stories for them,i must say i feel happy to find them enjoying books.